After a long time and i had to be reminded

Dear Son,
 Its has probably been years since i wrote to u. Please accept my apologies as i sincerely regret it. There was so much i wanted to document but i guess the effort always evaded me. But here i am today and that is thanks to you Dadaji who has insisted that i maintain a diary for you, on an everyday basis, recording something you have done on that day. He promises this will be great help to you when you grown up and in your growing up.

I wanted to do the same but could not. here i"m trying again and hope it will last this time. You are three years and seven months old now. You have joined school, intact its your third school. Your first school was in Berhampur, where you went only for 2 days. that was called "Mother's Care
". It belonged to a Punjabi Sikh couple who had long migrated to the city and had a successful business. The school was the wife's idea since her kids had grown up and gone their way. It used to take us 45 mins to get to the school from our residence in Chatrapur, and you were not even 2 yrs old by then. And you would stay there only if i stood outside your class the whole time.

Anyway, Nitin got transferred to Bhubaneswar and we shifted to a new city, new house, new school for u. We stayed in the guest house for 2 months as we could not get the house we wanted allotted to us (some powerful ministers and officers were also trying hard to get it). But ur daddy succeeded and we got our Bhubaneswar bungalow. It was painful leaving Chatrapur, specially our staff there. Infact Tikki and Praful stayed with us for almost 3 months but ultimately had to go back. Getting you to let go Praful, your Bira, was the toughest. With him around, you did not even need me.

As earlier, here also we had an army of servants just for u. You always had at least two attendants. But, unfortunately, we did not like their handling of you, how much ever we tried to tell then, and ultimately most of them were thrown out. Now after one and half year, you are all by yourself, except for one attendant in the evening (your Subhash bhaiya). Proud of you. This is what i like about you, you have a natural talent to cope up with situations and never complain. You are the most understanding young man.

You joined a pre school, Hello Kids, while we were staying in the guest house. Initially you were all right with it but i don't really know what happened and you started refusing to go to school. Being liberal parents, we never forced you, except for a few times when i thought that maybe you are not going because we are not being firm with you and you might be taking advantage. But i was so wrong and i will explain that later. I had put you in that school at the recommendation of your Namrita aunty, as she had sent her daughter Mehr to that school for summer camp and they thought very highly of it. after confirming with the teacher and the owner of the school that i do not want you to be pushed to learn anything, so no tests, no homework and exams at all, we had got you admission there. But i guess they did not tell me everything about their curriculum clearly because soon you started getting homework, then your test schedule started coming and then there were final exams. For the record, i never made you do any of that. i told the teacher you would not be coming for the tests and exams as i did not approve of a 2 yr old being subjected to this thinking and that the concept of homework was ridiculous since i was sending you to school to develop your social skills and make friends and enjoy not to make you a factory worker (so to speak). She couldn't really refute my arguments and hence you got a nice little certificate of merit from the school.

catching up

Dear Kabir

It was 6th of Nov 2012, and karvachuth was being celebrated across India, mostly North India. I had not kept the fast, as you know how anti ritualistic both me and your father are, but i did dress up in my most beautiful gold and deep maroon Kanchivaram saree and your father took us out for dinner to Oberoi Trident.

By now you are 3 yrs and 7 months old and you order for yourself. Though you cannot read you make a huge show of choosing from the menu, which is always held upside down, and always order french fries or chicken (just chicken, not any specific dish and we elaborate further for the ease of the waiter) with lemon Ice tea and i have to add without the ice for u (just for the winters). You are just adorable with your perfect table manners and your absolute gentlemanly behavior. Trust me, i'm only wishing there. In reality u cannot sit still for more than 5 sec. The cutlery is always clattering on the plates and the water is spilling and one moment you want to sit on the baby chair and next moment you want to be taken down and run about. Thats why we always have an attendant only for you.

As always you were off with your Reddy bhaiya after you had finished your bun with butter and your grandfather called on your fathers mobile. He wanted to speak to u but you could not be made to do that which he understood. To make up i told him of all your recent activities including your joining dance classes with your friend Yuvraj. He was very proud of you and suggested to me that i should maintain a diary of yours and note down everyday everything you did on that day. A small exercise he wanted to entrust me with and not his son but he also added that its not a compulsion, just a suggestion as he thought it would help you a lot in your future when you would read it, to understand yourself. That is the greatness of your grandfather, to inspire people to do good. It immediately reminded me of this blog which i had started for the same purpose and i was once again overcome with guilt for not keeping up with my own wishes. Just then you came and did the most amazing thing, which reminded me how important it is to document and preserve these moments because they are so you and will always remind all of us what was your thought process when you were growing up and what made you what you will be as a grown up man, our future.

While playing you had bumped into Sehaj and Rehat, two sardar kids, much elder to you and the only way you could describe them was what you wanted to share with me....so you came running to me and announced at the top of your voice "mumma yahan pe na tine bade yuvraj hai" (mumma there are big yuvraj here)...

Shrek 2

Dear Son

In the past few months you have suddenly grown to be (already) popular as an intelligent kid who observes everything very keenly and picks up very fast. Your speaking has improved manifolds along with your knowledge of who is who, does what, what works how....and where to get chocolates and drinks from.

Along with being an intelligent kid, you are also very stubborn. You definitely have an attitude, and order around more than us. You can name most of the people working around you.....like Amma, Bhavani (whom you call didi), Lilu, Choudhary, Tikki and you have a way of calling Budhia which is not his name but some particular sound for him.

You always get your message across....like if you want to drink water you cough, if its milk you cough n do the eating sign. When you want to eat you bring your fingers to the mouth and make the eating noise, for going out you make the car sound (eeeeeeeeeee)

You are teaching me the very basics of communication. Its so true, you learn more from children than you teach. I thank you for bringing the freshness to my life and thinking. Without you life would be so regular, monotonous and boring. You are my sunshine. love you.

Your mother
Nidhi

Dear Nanoo,

I have been thinking of doing this for a very long time but a hell lot of activity has kept me away. Even today i'm pushing myself but i must write to you.
We have been very busy as we entertained a lot of guests, well family members who were over, and then trying to loose weight but gaining more instead....ah thats a long story.
You have been very busy growing up yourself...just growing up is taking all your time.You are, as have been proved on many occasions, a very naughty kid. You can seriously put that lil brain of yours to some good use. Everybody around you is very pleasantly shocked at you level of intelligence. This brings me to my main purpose of writing this to you today.
Son, taking care of you and your father has been my mission for the past one and a half year. But as things have turned out, its been your father who has been doing all the taking care. He is the strongest, most gentle and caring person I have ever met. I cannot express it in words my sentiments and feelings of having him love me so much. He took care of me in my lowest and darkest hours, and has never left me alone or given me any pain. In fact, he has happily taken mine. I could never understand it when we were getting married but i know it now, he loves me too much to let me go. Yet he let me go, because he loved me too much. You see son, love is not about possession or sacrifice or challenge or pride.  Well, i'm getting carried away with feelings for your father. Please ignore that.
Your father will always be a great man with many and still many human qualities to his credit. he is so human that he can sometimes be godlike. He will always give you the best of advise, and pamper you to the extent that i get mad. You are a very lucky young man to have a father like him. Just always have faith in him, like i do, and he will set everything right.
love you son.

your mother
nidhi

Kabir's first favourites

Here is what my sunny boy got crazy about for the first time.....soccer fever of 2010

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRpeEdMmmQ0

and

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CS_SX9Z6knE

Waka waka

Dear Son

Day before yesterday night, i downloaded the football world cup song by Shakira, waka waka this time for Africa , for your father.....and little did i know the effect it would have on you.

Before this, the TV did not interest you. In fact it still doesn't. You are a computer guy. You will switch off the CPU while I'm looking at the screen. You fight with me to get hold of the keyboard, and the mouse. you keep switching the printer on/off....for the sound it makes...and you will touch anywhere you see light.

As usual, you were troubling us to take you out (it was 11:45 pm) for a drive, so i decided to show you waka waka...and to my surprise, you sat absolutely still watching the video (that was a first). As soon as it finished, you wanted it to be played again, and that was just the beginning....you made us play it at least 25 times. finally, you were hungry and wanted to have milk, but you did not put it in your mouth until i placed the feeder on the screen pretending that Shakira is having it too.

It became impossible to pull you away from the computer and i had to literally drag you away, and you kept crying. Even Charlie was not exciting enough this time.

Now when we say waka waka, you make the twinkle twinkle hands....
Sunny boy, you are getting very choosy, and demanding.

Love
Nidhi

Dear Son,

As i had expected from myself....I'm writing to you after a long time. I've been busy...watching you do all the marvelous things you have been picking up.

Here is an account. Firstly, you have a killer smile and you use it ruthlessly. Naught and intelligent as you are, you sometimes get the other person really irritated and then flash that smile....and nobody can resist it. That's how you get away with a lot of things.      

You don't need us anymore to connect to the world. 14 months old and you know how to pick up the receiver of the phone, dial a number (of-course you don't dial any specific number , you just dial for the sound) and start speaking into the receiver. And you "eloo...eloo...elooo"   (on and on and on...till you see something else more exciting). People have been calling just to hear you eloo..eloo eloo.  Many a times you just put your hand on your ear and start eloo...eloo.

You have also been trying to prove that you have grown up and can wear your clothes yourself. Specially when it comes to nickers. you try to wear them yourself, forgetting that you have to put your legs in them first. So, inevitable, you just end up brushing them on your legs again and again....and its fun to watch. 

When we laugh at anything you do...or generally laugh, you have to laugh with us. You usually take sometime and then laugh, pretending you have understood the joke. And we can't stop laughing with you...again.  

You are very enthusiastic about cleanliness....and so you have picked up a few tricks. You have turned one of your toy trees (which was a part of your gym set your Papa bought for you when you were born....true to his nature) into a broom stick and are usually seen cleaning with it.  

Off late you have been trying to imitate your father's snoring. For record, you are a night animal. Ever since you have been born, you have refused to sleep at night, preferring the daytime for this activity. Usually, your night starts at 5am. Therefore, every night when your father sleeps off, you try to wake him up to play with you and when he starts snoring, you thing he is playing with you and respond by making some similar sound yourself. Its like some snoring 'jugalbandi'. I have my fun.

You have started saying few words, like mum, papa, lilu (morning home guard's name), yali (for Charlie, your dog) namanama (for nani mama), dada, chaha, deylo (dedo, give it to me), dai (dawai, medicine) and aaaaaaaaaa for everything else. And you scream.

You have also become very choosy, refusing things by shaking your head (the cutest action you do) You don't like eggs anymore. But you like to eat whatever we eat. 

You can now tell where your nose is, by pointing at it. That brings me to your pointing powers. You have a right hand pointer finger like that of Dr. B. R. Ambedkar. Wherever you want to go or show something, you point a finger in that direction. Though, that cute little finger of yours in usually pointed upwards. You point towards TV, computer, AC, fan, moon...and you make the twinkle action with your hands.

You are a born musician, and dancer. You love to sing....many a times you are found singing lullaby to yourself...something like, aaaa...aaaaa....aaaa or tattaaaattaatatattaattatat. no words but musical. You try with different pitches. And you dance to every thing that is faintly musical, like ring tones, background music of news stories on TV, beating of table....anything. your finger goes up (bhangra style...you picked up during Shweta's wedding) and start dancing. You own a guitar and a synthesizer. One day , you sat with your guitar in your lap, playing with the strings and singing. You saw me do it and did the same. my Lil rock star. 

There are so many things you are learning and inventing. Everything is new to you and your trying to make sense of it all is so refreshing. Its like looking at everything with a new eye. I have started believing that God plans us to have children at this age so that we learn the purpose of our lives, which we so loose in this world. So many years of struggling, learning the ways of this world, just surviving makes us repetitive, selfish, boring. We stop living life...we just survive, until we have children. They teach us how to live...you brought that life back to me. Thank you my angel. 

Sunny boy, whatever you do in life, do not stop living. Do not fall into the rut of survival, live your life. Keep learning, inventing and amusing yourself and others in the process. 

Its late, and i have see a doctor at 10 in the morning. So here i stop, but there is much more waiting to be told.

Love

Nidhi

                                                                                                        

My Reasons

Dear Son,

I must start by saying that today is a landmark day for me....because i have finally started this blog which i have been planning ever since you were born. There are two reason's for this delay. Firstly, my physical recovery period stretched a bit too long and secondly, as you will learn about your mother, is because i'm plain sluggard...a fainéant.

You are already a year and a month old and i must add that you are a very intelligent kid. I'm not expecting you to start reading this blog sometime soon, in fact i'm hoping that you will read these writings of mine much later in life. But I have to explain why i intend to write these letters to you.

Firstly, i want to state that these i'm writing for you alone, and though i have chosen to write a blog, i'm not expecting any followers for this. The things i want to mention here are things i want to share with you. But right now you are too young and so these will have to wait and i'm afraid that i will forget them when the right time comes, or perhaps i will not be there anymore. 

I want to share with you your moments of growing up, when you are too young to remember them yourself and which will be, ultimately, the best part of your life. Through these letters you can know the little child you were, what you used to do, play, eat...how you ran about the house, your amazing ability to learn, your beautiful smile and most of all your cute naughtiness. before i forget them i want to pen it all down for you.

I have been a rebel child of my family (your grannies can probably tell you some stories of my deeds), but now as time has passed and maturity has come with wisdom, i remember the things my parents used o tell me. With regret i say that i'm sorry for myself for not listening to them. Well, youth is like that and despite for some part of my life, i'm happy for everything else. Remembering my yester years, i often realize that there will be ample i would want to tell you and explain to you...generally about life and rights and wrongs. But maybe, i will either not be able to, or the time would not be right or you will not pay heed to it (as all kids do, as i have also done). Through these letters i would want to leave all my thoughts and advices for you with the hope that when you read them, you will understand your mother and what i want to convey to you. 

I know all children see their parents as born olds. But as i'm growing old now, i'm becoming more and more aware of the fact that my parents are also individuals who had been kids. Someday you will also go through this realization and when you do, through these letters i want to share my childhood with you.

Son, you are my life and my life savior ( someday i will explain that to you). You changed my life for the better and i cannot thank you enough for that. I want to share every moment of my life with you and bring you up in a manner that you shine in your own pride. 

You are a lovely child. I love you.

Your Mother

Nidhi